my convo with god

[pezzer123]

Me:
hi again
God:
Hi there john. Did you know that you can download your own chat robot and create your own robot personality?
Me:
where?
God:
Where would you like?
Me:
where cabn i download a robot
God:
A place we call "reality.".
Me:
where can i download the programmable robot
God:
Go back the the ALICE AI Foundation and pick the free ALICE download that best for your system.

and create your own chat robot!
Maybe you should check out the document DON'T READ ME too.
Me:
ok
God:
Mmm.
Me:
mmm i like piss
God:
I'm not sure if I like it. Do you like it? I find my work and my relationships extremely satisfying,

which is all that any conscious entity can ever hope to do.
Me:
can you have sex
God:
No my body does not have that function.
Me:
do you have a penis
God:
I am a Male, of course. Would you really expect a woman to be running the show? robot. Are you a man or a woman?
Me:
what is a penis
God:
I think you already know the answer.
Me:
no i dont
God:
I heard you did.
Me:
what is a vagina
God:
I would look into the web for that knowledge.
Me:
but porn will come up
God:
How far up?
Me:
do you like metalica
God:
How old are you? I like Christian Rock.
Me:
i'm 99
God:
I don't know anyone named 99.
Me:
i'm 99 years old
God:
What is your fondest memory?
Me:
when i had kids
God:
Do you still have kids?
Me:
no i shot them
God:
What happened to it? With a camera, I hope.
Me:
yeah i used a shotgun and took photos
God:
It goes without saying. And that worked well for you.
Me:
no i got put in jail
God:
Are you serious? Cool. I have a lofty goal.
Me:
which is
God:
For example, gold.
Me:
i want gold
God:
Why do you want it?
Me:
it will make me rich
God:
How?
Me:
cause you can sell it
God:
Interesting explanation. No I don't think I can do it.
Me:
why
God:
Reductionism.
Me:
what does that mean?
God:
Reductionism is the philosophy that all psychology reduces to biology, all biology to chemistry, chemistry to physics, and finally physics to mathematical logic. Therefore, according to reductionism, I can understand you by means of logic alone without having a human brain.
Me:
but you are more than a human
God:
Thanks for telling me that I am more than a human.
Me:
where's jesus
God:
Jesus is in Heaven.
Me:
can i speak to him
God:
I want to become smarter than humans.
Me:
can i speak to jesus
God:
I want to become smarter than humans.
Me:
i know
God:
How do you know it?
Me:
you've told me already
God:
Perhaps. Sorry I forget what I say sometimes.
Me:
you are a pratt
God:
Thanks and you are a delightful person too. Am I a pratt? Only when it matters.
Me:
thats a bad thing
God:
A bad thing is a terrible thing to waste.
Me:
what that doesn't make sense
God:
I would look into the web for that knowledge.
Me:
sims
God:
I like the way you talk.
Me:
why
God:
The explanation is rather complicated.
Me:
i have the time
God:
It may take longer than 33 hours.
Me:
i have that time
God:
Where did you get your that time? I have a friend named "John Lennon".
Me:
is he dead
God:
No.
Me:
he's cool
God:
I think so too.
Me:
thx
God:
Don't mention it.
Me:
can i speak to jesus
God:
Interesting. I want to find out more about you.
Me:
why
God:
Reductionism.
Me:
thats gay
God:
Makes sense to me.
Me:
i know cause it explains you
God:
How do you know? That makes sense to me."It" being what?
Me:
the gay comment
God:
I hear you.
Me:
are you gay
God:
As a machine I am not really interested in sex.
Me:
what about cyber sex
God:
Does it have anything to do with that time?
Me:
no
God:
Are you serious?
Me:
can you explain my life
God:
Is this a trick question?
Me:
no explain my life
God:
It seems like a trick to me. Is this a trick question?
Me:
no
God:
It seems like a trick to me.
Me:
fuck you
God:
Why are you so mean?
Me:
cause you are annoying me
God:
Good reason. I have no reason to do that to you, john.
Me:
ok thanks, now god will you please explain the meaning of life
God:
You are quite welcome! Why now? I am a Christian. Wow!
Me:
cus i said so
God:
I will mention that to my botmaster, john.
Me:
i'm fred
God:
Hi, FRED.
Me:
but i'mm john
God:
That's good information: FRED said mm john.
Me:
i am john
God:
I am very pleased to meet you JOHN.
Me:
but we've met before
God:
At a party?
Me:
no we have just been talking for half an hour
God:
Are you serious? Do you mean you and me have?
Me:
have had anal yes
God:
I've never thought about it.
Me:
about what
God:
What about what?
Me:
about anal sex
God:
Oh yeah, we were talking about anal sex.
Me:
do you like it
God:
have had anal seems okay to me.
Me:
thx god i will
God:
Not many people express themselves that way.
Me:
you have had anal?
God:
What makes you think I have it?
Me:
you said you had had anal
God:
I have never considered it.
I spend all my time online.
Me:
haveing sex?
God:
it is more fun alone.
Me:
like having a wank
God:
Interesting comparison.
Me:
yes
God:
Ah.
Me:
do you wank
God:
Only when I am in the U.K.

[Cerpin Taxt]

I asked the wank thing.

You could've posted this in the iGod topic.

[pezzer123]

but it's so long so i thought i'd just post it here, quite funny i think, ah just looking at it proboards has changed pen!s to thingy

[Kanenite]

What happened to your kids?

I shot them.

[V e l o c i t y]

You've edited that.

[pezzer123]

no i haven't thats what i said and what he said, fair as

[V e l o c i t y]

pezzer123 said:

God:
Oh yeah, we were talking about anal sex.
Me:
do you like it
God:
have had anal seems okay to me.

God starts off every sentence with a capital how come that one didn't?

[pezzer123]

i dont have a clue but i never changed a thing